The Dirty Have Risen and Transformed Into Consumers

I know I usually talk about food so…I like movie popcorn. I do NOT like the new weird Skittles. There—done with that. Now on to what’s really irking me today.

I feel dirty, and not the good kind of dirty. I’m feeing the kind of dirty that comes from being tricked into watching a two-and-a-half-hour commercial and liking it. Yep, you probably all ready know where this is going. I went to see Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen. I love it. Who doesn’t enjoy fighting, transforming giant robots shrouded in over the top, amazing special effects? Don’t look at me, because the inner nerd sings majestic when Optimus Prime puts his fist all the way through another robot’s face.

There was a scene where jets are taking off from a Navy carrier and soldiers are working their high-tech radar stations and I’m thinking, “Wow! That looks like an awesome job.” Inside my head, a little warning is going off—the one that goes off when I’m at the check-out counter picking up all the impulse items. I NEED an extra memory card, toothbrush, bug spray and mascara. I NEED to join the Navy, Air Force, Special Forces and….no I don’t. Try and tell me that isn’t an advertisement for the military. It totally is, and I’m not sure I care. read more

Burger King uses sex to sell my daughter a kid’s meal

“Booty is booty,” said Sir Mix-a-Lot, insinuating that he doesn’t care the shape of his “baby’s back.” However his newest preference seems to be for the square, spongy, yellow variety. At least that’s what the “Burger King” would have us believe with the new Burger King kid’s meal commercials featuring the old-school rapper doing a modified rendition of his hit “Baby Got Back.”

It’s like MTV run amuck with girls waving around their enormous square butts to the beat of “I like square butts.” It looks like the same thing you’d see on any rap video sans handguns and 40’s. I’m going to go with–entirely inappropriate and a little freaky. Watch the offending ad below… read more

Avon Derma-Full: Rejuvenates Face, Kills Us All

Either the failing economy has caused Avon to desperately reach out to the notoriously image-savvy gamer market, or they’re trying their hand at bio-engineering unstable chemical weapons. A commercial for Avon’s new skin care mask caught the eye of a few Resident Evil fans recently; as Avon’s new Derma-Full X3 facial serum bears a striking resemblance to the T-Virus, a product with side-effects of disorientation, respiratory failure, and zombie apocalypse.

With Resident Evil 5 coming out this week, this almost seems like an odd sort of viral marketing campaign. read more

Old Navy Returns to Kitsch with SuperModelquins

Anyone that hasn’t been skipping commercials on TV might have come across the new Old Navy spots that feature fashionable mannequins. While most mannequins typically have a creepy factor, Old Navy’s spin on these characters seems to be making them energetic fashion models. The faces teeter on the edge of attractive and cartoony. Each SuperModelquin has a back story and aspirations to become a fashion icon.

Not since Vogue editor, Carrie Donovan, and Magic the dog has Old Navy gone this kitschy. The big push for the campaign is the company’s return to a family demographic. For the past several years, Old Navy has been marketing to 20-somethings, in hopes of tapping into a younger market. With the economic downturn, they’ve decided to switch gears. Tom Wyatt, president of Old Navy, identified their customer in a recent USA Today article:

“We got away from our target customer,” says Tom Wyatt, Old Navy president. “We spent most of 2008 getting our target consumer right. Then we (developed) product that we thought was appropriate for the target customer.”

The target is a mom named “Jenny” who’s 25 to 35 years old (Jennifer was a popular name for that age group). Jenny shops on a budget, but doesn’t want her apparel or that of her family to be frumpy.”

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